I’m a sharer.
That sounds like a virtue. It is one. But it has a side I didn’t see for a while.

Over the past few years, a lot of people passed through my life. Sometimes literally, the door was always open. Questions about cameras, lenses, workflows, drone, audio, video, how to run your business, who you are working with…. . I’m nearly two decades in this industry and I share what I know freely. No problem. Happy to do it.

And it’s not just the door. Social media made it permanent. Questions come in from early morning to late at night. DMs, comments, replies, … always something. I answer. Because that’s what I do.

What I was less happy about: watching those “friendships” quietly disappear once the knowledge transfer was done. Not with a bang. Just slowly. One fewer message. Then another. Until there was nothing left.

At some point, I started seeing a pattern.

Weekdays? Always available. Weekends? Doesn’t work.

Here’s how it goes. During the week: sure, let’s meet up, feel free to reach out, happy to talk. Especially if there’s a technical question involved, a practical problem, something they need me for. My schedule was never empty for those conversations. And online, I was reachable around the clock, no filter, no delay.
I'm the work-week buddy. The colleague you grab coffee with between jobs. The one you call when you're stuck on something and need a straight answer. That role I know well. I've unintentionally played it a lot.

But then I’d ask on a Friday: want to do something this weekend? A walk. Coffee. Just hanging out?. No agenda, no knowledge transfer, no reason except showing up.

Doesn’t work.
Family obligations. A full calendar. Something that was already planned. Or no reply. Or a vague “next time” that never becomes a next time.

I’ve seen this with enough people to know it’s not a coincidence. That’s not friendship. That’s an unpaid consultancy arrangement.
Some of those people are now my competitors.
I schooled them. Gladly. Still would.

The test doesn’t filter on character. It filters on interest. Are there people who pass? Yes. Not many. But they exist and that’s exactly what makes them easy to spot. They also show up on a Saturday afternoon. No reason. No question. Just there.

I’m not going to stop sharing. That doesn’t change. But I’ve stopped confusing friendship with usefulness. The weekend test is simple, free and almost nobody passes.

To be clear, I'm not bitter. I'm not a lonely cowboy riding off into the sunset. My life is full enough and thank god there is also a lot of empty space.
(Wich is by the way very good for the mind, soul & creativity).
This is just a social observation.
Something I noticed, named and now recognise pretty fast!